IX. How does a bracha/blessing work? It works only as well as the intention behind it. The word, “Beracha,” is derived from, “bereicha,” a powerfully flowing stream. The idea is to expand God’s presence in the world through whatever it is that you are doing, whether a Mitzvah or eating. We have an opportunity to connect to the “Source of All Blessing,” as in, “Baruch Ata Hashem,” “You are the Source of All Blessing,” with everything we do.

We can transform an orange into an expression of God’s love and care with the blessing we recite. We can change a piece of meat, something dead, into something that is very much alive on a spiritual level.

The actual mechanics of a blessing are complex. (You can listen to Da’at Tevunot 1 on thefoundationstone.org for a detailed explanation. Or Chadash: Blessings, How To Make A Blessing 1 & 2)

Question X.

What are the halachic problems with masturbation and how can we control the amount we do it?

The issue is wasting potential. We have hundreds of millions of cells with the potential to create life and when we waste those cells, we are wasting that potential.

Another issue is living in a world of fantasy, which distracts us from reality. Consider how often people do it when bored, or frustrated with life.

Another issue is that our fantasies create a vision that is usually very different from reality. Most women are not as physically perfect as those in our fantasies. The actual experience often will not measure up to the expectations of our fantasies.

Another issue is that we are practicing very limited, self-focused sex, which then makes it difficult to use physical intimacy as the deepest expression of love for our wives.

Another issue is that we train our minds to think of women only in terms of physical pleasure rather than in the context of relationship. In fact, we are willing to have our pleasure at someone else’s expense.

The best way to control the urge is to not feel guilty after masturbating, but to say, “I’ll try more next time to control my urges.” The guilt actually makes it harder to control.

All that being said, the Gemara is quite straightforward that it is the rare individual who will never spill his seed.

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