|Life Lessons: Chukat: Are You Missing The Miracles|
|Written by Heileger Chana Chaya|
Have you ever felt really upset about something that was taking place in your life? Did you ever wonder how God could do that to you? In Parshat Chukat (Bamidbar 21:15) we are told that B’nai Yisroel were crossing the desert and they were oblivious to the fact that the Amorites were waiting in ambush to kill them all. God saved B’nai Yisroel by moving two mountains together, crushing the Amorites. B’nai Yisroel did not even know they were about to be attacked and did not know what Hashem did for them. At least they did not know until they saw two mountains moved together and a stream of blood and bones flowing between the mountains. Had they not seen that, they would have missed the miracle that God killed the Amorites before they had the opportunity to kill the Israelites. Had they not noticed the bloody stream between the mountains, they could have gone on without the deep knowledge that God loves them so much and that he moved mountains to save them.God loves us too. And when we open our eyes we can notice that we have little miracles happening all the time.
Let me tell you one of mine that happened a few weeks ago on the Ramchal Shabbos.It’s a real drag being sick, be it God forbid, the flu, a virus, a toothache, an autoimmune condition, a cancer or anything else that makes us feel less well. Being sick is certainly NOT a time when we feel the great miracles of the Ribbono Shel Olam (Master of the World.)
In fact, the time of illness is, for many of us, likely to be a time of wondering how and why God could do this to “me.”
And so it was for me the past few weeks. To bring you up to date, I was diagnosed with illness in 1997 known as RSD which is known to be quite serious but which also for me was a great gift in that it changed the whole direction of my life, giving me an even more fulfilling and joyful profession than I had before. So, now my life direction includes the honor of healing and life-coaching many people who I find to be amazing and beautiful.
On the Ramchal Shabbos 2009, several of us were in the Catskill Mountains being transformed by Rabbi Weinberg’s words and being.
On Shabbos morning, Rabbi said to me that there is a very sick little girl here and “Do you want to heal her or should I?”
I usually do not work on people when they are contagious because my own immunities are nothing to rave about. But hearing that if I don’t do it, Rabbi will, I felt I had no choice. And so, the mother brought me into their bungalow and I worked on the adorable 3-year old getting her to agree to have me work on her and to feel better.
By that Tuesday, I felt ill but tried to ignore myself and kept pushing. As I was preparing for my Thursday evening appointment, I realized that I could not keep my head up. I called to cancel that appointment and had to cancel Friday as well. Instead, my husband, who is an MD, ordered blood tests and went with me to get tested to see if an antibiotic would help.
For me, having to cancel all of my clients in a day is not a miracle or a blessing. I felt greatly frustrated and worried that I would not be able to work on Sunday either, which did come to happen.
So what’s the miracle? Why is a virus something to share about with all of my friends?
Had I not been as ill as I was, my husband would not have sent me for blood work. The miracle was that I went for those blood tests. The results revealed that many values were seriously low, way out of range. They showed me that I must start working on myself as I do on others. The levels had nothing to do with the virus. The virus was the gift that shed light on further healing work that we has to be done. Had we not known, we would not have done the healing work necessary to fix this. Once we got the results, we began working on it and by the following Shabbos afternoon I was feeling much better.
I could look at getting ill as a curse and I could resent having to cancel working with clients. But that would mean that I would have to be blind to the fact that God pointed me in the direction of fixing a serious health issue.
Rabbi Weinberg may or may not have known that I needed to feel sick in order to find this other issue. But it is clear to me that in any case, he was guided by Hashem. I got sick so that I may get better.
We can choose to view the events of our lives as annoyances or worse.
Or we can choose to see the miracles in our everyday struggles and marvel at them.
The choice is ours.
I leave you with a question: God saved B’nai Yisroel by moving mountains.
What mountains is God moving to help you?
Copyright 2009 Chana Klein, MSEd, PCC, EEMCP, ACG, PACG